A Tidings of Magpies

by Hal Sirowitz "When you have blown your nose, you should not open your handkerchief and inspect it, as though pearls or rubies had dropped out of your skull." The Book of Manners (1958) After you have blown your nose, Father said, it's not polite to look inside your handkerchief to see what it looks like. You're not a doctor. What's more important is getting the handkerchief back into your pocket without staining your pants. There are some things it's better not to look at. It should be left to your imagination, but if you have a strong desire to look you can always find pictures of it in a medical book.

"We're going on a pig hunt. We're going to catch a big one. What a beautiful day! We're not scared. Oh-oh! A pig! A troupe of portly pigs. We can't go over it. We can't go under it. Oh, no! We've got to go through it!" Going back for two more days in Neurodramaville. Haven't heard yet if any little piggies have come to visit us, but I'm certain we're on high alert for them. Our unit deals with neurosurgical/neurological injuries--which doesn't mean a patient could not additionally have the flu, but more likely those patients would be on the Medicine floors. Visitors are much more worrisome. You know, the folks who come in to see their neighbor's cousin's nephew's girlfriend and bring their carload of school aged children to spread the love. Stay home. CDC recommendations: 1. Wash your hands frequently with hot, soapy water. 2. Cover your mouth and nose when coughing or sneezing. 3. See your doctor-- NOT THE ER -YOUR FAMILY ...

Loading a Boar by David Lee We were loading a boar, a goddam mean big sonofabitch and he jumped out of the pickup four times and tore out my stockracks and rooted me in the stomach and I fell down and he bit John on the knee and he thought it was broken and so did I and the boar stood over in the far corner of the pen and watched us and John and I just sat there tired and Jan laughed and brought us a beer and I said, "John it aint worth it, nothing's going right and I'm feeling half dead and haven't wrote a poem in ages and I'm ready to quit it all," and John said, "shit, young feller, you aint got started yet and the reason's cause you trying to do it outside yourself and aint looking in and if you wanna by god write pomes you gotta write pomes about what you know and not about the rest and you can write about pigs and that boar and Jan and you and me and the rest and there aint no way you're gonna quit," and we drank beer and smoked,...